"I declare after all there is no enjoyment like reading! How much sooner one tires of anything than of a book! When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library."
Lalalalaaaa!! I shall post this now and get it out of my system. Are you ready? I am lucky enough to have in my possession an advance copy of the fabulous ‘Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops’ by the equally fabulous Jen Campbell. Looky looky, I have my own copy and it’s so beautiful. It also has Jen’s writing in it. I have lots of letters and cards and stuff all over my house with Jen’s writing all over them because Jen is the queen of snail mail but this is special because this is a book and Jen wrote it and I have all the proud friend feelings right now. Jen, if you don’t know, is a very talented writer, she has had both short stories and poems published, had a poem animated for the recent Smile London campaign, has a full poetry collection awaiting publication later this year and also has a short story collection and a novel in the works. She’s awesome. I’m telling you now, this girl is going to make it big and you read it here first [unless of course you are here because Jen …
“I have a friendship cake that I think I might have to bake during our
stay at Jane’s – is it acceptable to take cake batter on a road trip?” Helen asked one day, via email. “What on earth is a friendship cake?” I replied. Her answer didn’t really clear things up, “Herman is a friendship cake –
he’s German.” ‘”I’m so confused right now” I told her, “you don’t even know.” A few days later, with my own little [gooey] Herman and a set of
instructions it all became clear. Herman is a chain letter. Or rather he’s a
chain cake, a sour dough cake in
fact, and he comes with no horrible
consequences but rather a lot of responsibility [if you put him in the fridge
he will die; if he stops bubbling he is dead; some days he gets hungry and
eventually, no matter how much you feed him, he winds up starving.] I poured him into a mixing bowl and poked at him with a spoon. He didn’t
look well. I worried the outlook wasn’t good. Still, God loves a trier. “This
is Herman.” I told Ian as I covered him [Her…
Last weekend Helen
and I jumped on the Groupon bandwagon with what [on paper] seemed a very
exciting deal: afternoon tea with a twist, [from the Groupon ad] “adding a twist to afternoon tea, Beluga's
version of the pre-dinner pinky lifter eschews warm beverages in favour of the
more exciting cocktail. Bellini cocktails will be poured from a teapot and
served with a selection of sandwiches, such as cucumber, smoked salmon, and
cheese and ham. Scones with clotted cream and a cake stand flanked by teatime
treats will also be included for duos to feast on.”
Hmmmm. Well. I’m not sure I’d call it Afternoon Tea but there
was certainly a twist, if the fact that is was potentially the worst dining
experience of my life counts as a twist.
We had a table booked for 5pm and arrived at about 4.55
where we were kept waiting for almost ten minutes, the waiter, when he finally
arrived glanced at his watch and snippishly told us we were late. Actually, no,
we were on time. Black mark number
March, already? Seriously, how did that happen? I can't believe we're at the end of week 9. I'll be retiring before I know it - a girl can dream, right?
Yesterday was the 29th of February.
A leap year.
Now now, calm yourselves down please! This girl did not celebrate in the traditional sense by asking her boyfriend to marry her. No she did not. Call me traditional but if he likes it then he can jolly well be the one to put a ring on it. Beyonce had a point, people.
Instead, I went to the gym and gave myself a stitch on the crosstrainer and had a swim and spent longer in the jacuzzi than I'd spent exercising because,well, because I wanted to and I offer no excuses or apologies. I then went home planning to eat peanut butter on toast [crunchy, always crunchy] only to discover Ian was cooking pasta.
Bless him I hear you say. Yes, that's what I thought.
There then followed a scene that I'm pretty sure wouldn't be out of place on some comedy sketch program whe…